So, I haven't updated in quite sometime now so I think I shall update.
I've been writing.. well starting poems lately but always end up not finishing them. I will when I can.
On another topic, I will write about whats really dominating my thoughts at the moment. I can't stop thinking about everything that happened today. I'm sure i'm over thinking again, but i'm still quite worried. I'm worried that you're only still with me out of fear. Only still with me because you're afraid of what I might do if you leave me. And I don't want that.. really I just want you to be happy and if the only way for you to really be happy is to be with him... then thats what I want you to do. I guess it all goes back to the saying "If you love someone you must let them go" and it's the hardest thing in the world. I just hope you're still with me because you want to be with me and you want to grow up with me and go to New York and get 5 cats, Miles, Sabbath, Ni-Chi, Snow, and Mystery. I can't figure it out. I can't remember anything unless it has to do with you and I can't feel anything unless i'm with you. I can't speak when i'm near you because I can't find the words to say. I'm to busy over thinking what I want to say and then arguing with myself about not saying it until I don't say it. I'm trying. Really I am. I want to be the perfect boyfriend and i'm trying with everything I have TO be the perfect boyfriend. This is just all new to me so I feel like i'm doing everything wrong. I know, I know. Over thinking again. I guess the point of this post is to tell you I want you to be happy and no matter what happens, I promise, I will always love you, Destany. Until I die. Until we die.