Friday, July 29, 2011

Adolf Hitler: Unfathomably brilliant.

You would have to be blind, ignorant, uneducated and mindless to not realize the potential Adolf Hitler had, the brilliance of his mind (which is beguiling; nearly unfathomable even) and the drive in his heart;the motivation and persistence he withheld. You people are simply blinded by the blood shed and torture so many had endured. You must look past that, I’m not saying it wasn’t wrong, because yes, it was. However, Adolf Hitler was truly a genius when it came to public speaking, manipulating, and even brainwashing in a sense. But in the end, this man born with such impossible intelligence used that knowledge for a terrible cause, but despite the way he used his intelligence, it was still intelligence none the less and Adolf Hitler was a genius.

P.S. It makes you think if there was a God, he must have been on vacation during the holocaust (and so many other terrible events that have occurred in history and are occurring as I write this.) But that’s a completely different topic.

Change of plans?

I'm ending the only using lyrics as a title from this point on. It's obnoxious finding lyrics that fit the general topic of what I'm writing about so from this point forward, my titles shall be whatever I feel is fit; lyrics or not.

On another note, I've been working on my own rendition of a found poem. For those of you who don't know, a found poem is when you take sentences from a story and put them together to make a poem out of it. However, I'm had an idea to tweak that idea a bit, I decided to take lyrics from different songs and fit them together into a poem. It's harder than I once thought but I promise to post it as soon as I finish.

Also a shout out to my new follower! She's totally rad, so follow her. Here. Now. This second. HURRY DAMMIT! Link! --> http://caroline-albanese.blogspot.com/

Friday, July 22, 2011

The world is black and hearts are cold.


-9mm:  murder-desu:  Junko Furuta This is the story of Junko Furuta, a 17 year old girl who was held captive by 4 teenagers. DAY 1: November 22, 1988: KidnappedKept captive in house, and posed as one of boy’s girlfriendRaped (over 400 times in total)Forced to call her parents and tell them she had run awayStarved and malnutritionedFed cockroaches to eat and urine to drinkForced to masturbateForced to strip in front of othersBurned with cigarette lightersForeign objects inserted into her vagina/anus DAY 11: December 1, 1988: Severely beat up countless timesFace held against concrete ground and jumped onHands tied to ceiling and body used as a punching bagNose filled with so much blood that she can only breath through her mouthDumbbells dropped onto her stomachVomited when tried to drink water (her stomach couldn’t accept it)Tried to escape and punished by cigarette burning on armsFlammable liquid poured on her feet and legs, then lit on fireBottle inserted into her anus, causing injury DAY 20: December10, 1989: Unable to walk properly due to severe leg burnsBeat with bamboo sticksFireworks inserted into anus and litHands smashed by weights and fingernails crackedBeaten with golf clubCigarettes inserted into vaginaBeaten with iron rods repeatedlyWinter; forced outside to sleep in balconySkewers of grilled chicken inserted into her vagina and anus, causing bleeding DAY 30: Hot wax dripped onto faceEyelids burned by cigarette lighterStabbed with sewing needles in chest areaLeft nipple cut and destroyed with pliersHot light bulb inserted into her vaginaHeavy bleeding from vagina due to scissors insertionUnable to urinate properlyInjuries were so severe that it took over an hour for her to crawl downstairs and use the bathroomEardrums severely damagedExtreme reduced brain size DAY 40: Begged her torturers to “kill her and get it over with” January 1, 1989: Junko greets the New Years Day aloneBody mutilatedUnable to move from the ground DAY 44: January 4, 1989: The four boys beat her mutilated body with an iron barbell, using a loss at the game of Mah-jongg as a pretext. She is profusely bleeding from her mouth and nose. They put a candle’s flame to her face and eyes. Then, lighter fluid was poured onto her legs, arms, face and stomach, and then lit on fire. This final torture lasted for a time of two hours. Junko Furuta died later that day, in pain and alone. Nothing could compare 44 days of suffering she had to go through. When her mother heard the news and details of what had happened to her daughter, she fainted. She had to undergo a psychiatric outpatient treatment . Imagine her endless pain. Her killers are now free men.   I think I’m going to be sick.   oh my god…  People fuckin’ suck. Governments are useless. What the fuck is wrong with the world?

-9mm:

murder-desu:

Junko Furuta

This is the story of Junko Furuta, a 17 year old girl who was held captive by 4 teenagers.

DAY 1: November 22, 1988: Kidnapped
Kept captive in house, and posed as one of boy’s girlfriend
Raped (over 400 times in total)
Forced to call her parents and tell them she had run away
Starved and malnutritioned
Fed cockroaches to eat and urine to drink
Forced to masturbate
Forced to strip in front of others
Burned with cigarette lighters
Foreign objects inserted into her vagina/anus

DAY 11: December 1, 1988: Severely beat up countless times
Face held against concrete ground and jumped on
Hands tied to ceiling and body used as a punching bag
Nose filled with so much blood that she can only breath through her mouth
Dumbbells dropped onto her stomach
Vomited when tried to drink water (her stomach couldn’t accept it)
Tried to escape and punished by cigarette burning on arms
Flammable liquid poured on her feet and legs, then lit on fire
Bottle inserted into her anus, causing injury

DAY 20: December10, 1989:

Unable to walk properly due to severe leg burns
Beat with bamboo sticks
Fireworks inserted into anus and lit
Hands smashed by weights and fingernails cracked
Beaten with golf club
Cigarettes inserted into vagina
Beaten with iron rods repeatedly
Winter; forced outside to sleep in balcony
Skewers of grilled chicken inserted into her vagina and anus, causing bleeding

DAY 30: Hot wax dripped onto face
Eyelids burned by cigarette lighter
Stabbed with sewing needles in chest area
Left nipple cut and destroyed with pliers
Hot light bulb inserted into her vagina
Heavy bleeding from vagina due to scissors insertion
Unable to urinate properly
Injuries were so severe that it took over an hour for her to crawl downstairs and use the bathroom
Eardrums severely damaged
Extreme reduced brain size

DAY 40: Begged her torturers to “kill her and get it over with”

January 1, 1989: Junko greets the New Years Day alone
Body mutilated
Unable to move from the ground

DAY 44: January 4, 1989: The four boys beat her mutilated body with an iron barbell, using a loss at the game of Mah-jongg as a pretext. She is profusely bleeding from her mouth and nose. They put a candle’s flame to her face and eyes.

Then, lighter fluid was poured onto her legs, arms, face and stomach, and then lit on fire. This final torture lasted for a time of two hours.

Junko Furuta died later that day, in pain and alone. Nothing could compare 44 days of suffering she had to go through.

When her mother heard the news and details of what had happened to her daughter, she fainted. She had to undergo a psychiatric outpatient treatment . Imagine her endless pain.

Her killers are now free men.

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

I'm about to have a nervous breakdown.

So yeah, I was up late with a fucking stomach ache from Hell until I passed out on the couch. I had to make myself puke out the pain. It was just fantastic -_-
Anyway, now I'm fucking hungry and my stomach still hurts. We have cheerios. No milk. Just cheerios. And they're not even Honey nut! Fuck me! I was gonna go make toast. but no. The fucking bread is moldy as shit.
Then, to top it all off, my plans for today include getting my retainer fitting or whatever and possibly going to my brother's new apartment with his girlfriend. Once again: Fuck me! I hate being around him and even more so when he's with his girlfriend. I think I've said about 20 words to her in my lifetime, honestly. Therefore it will be awkward and I'll be forced to go because I have to get my retainer. Also I got in a fight with my mom this morning. Again....
Fuck me! -_-

Monday, July 18, 2011

I don't care. I don't care. I don't care about this world.

I'm kind of dead inside.
Like, I can't care.
Not that I don't care.
It's that I can't care.
And I don't care.
But what's the point?
My brother's moving out tomorrow.
I'm thinking we;ll be moving out in a few months.
We'll end up stopping the payments in a month and we'll get kicked out a couple months after that.
My mom mentioned moving to Oakhurst.
That would be cool. I could skate to school.
Walk somewhere for breakfast.
I'd love it
It's the closest thing t oa city I'd ever be living in.
The house would suck, I'm sure. But whatever.
I can live with that.
In a couple years I'm moving to San Francisco.
I think my mind's set.
I like it there.
It's crowded, but it's a good crowd.
You know?
I don't know why I'm writing like this.
I really don't.
Whatever.
I think-
GASP!
I've got an idea for my story.
Must.
Go.
Write.
BYE!

And I just can't find my place in this world.

Morrissey - Ouija Board

Good song.

That's all I have to say.

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Trick or treat the bitter and the sweet.

Face to face

Leave me, Leave me, Leave me, Leave me, Leave me alone.

Well, I don't have anything significant to post. Just feel like writing whatever comes to mind. We have weird conversations. Last night. Destany and I were talking as always and despite how much we talk, we never run out of interesting things to say. Weird things to talk about, but entertaining none the less. Let's see, we covered what musician we'd sleep with, we figured out if the wolf in Little Red Riding Hood was the same wolf in The Three Little Pigs. It's not. We learned that Dez may or may not have a slight case of Narcolepsy, Learned how many guys Destany sleeps with to make as much money as she does, learned I could get one free night with her, (<-- Joking...... all my nights are free!) She's not really a whore so back the fuck off!! All though, if she was a whore it would look something like this -->


I love this picture! =D
And I love her.
Destany.
Not her ^^^^^^
Destany.
Not the one on the bed.
Destany.
I love Destany Dammit!

We talked about what movie character she would be, she found out if I'm wearing socks, we found out if we wear socks to bed (And really what we were to bed in general.), how many jeans I own, How I got a gaping hole in the crotch of my jeans, we discussed oral sex and would we do it to ourselves if possible, (Yes I realize things got awkward, it was fun =]) Then we talked about masturbation. Again, awkward. Luckily, I never feel awkward, I just laugh when she gets all awkward and red and stutterey =]

Anyway, that was the highlight of my day.
Pathetic, yes I realize.
It's not really pathetic.
You'd understand if you knew her like I do.
Talking to her would be the highlight of your day too..

My brother is moving out Tuesday. It's gonna be lame. Everyone's gonna be crying and I'm just gonna be on the computer playing games -_- I realize I'm a nerd.. He's moving 45 minutes away and he's never home anyway. The only difference is I won't see him when he comes home late at night and I'm still up, we won't be able to talk anymore like we used too (We talk a lot.. well, we used to. Ever since we shared a room when we were kids we got really close. But as we grew up we both changed, grew apart. However we do still have late night conversations sometimes.. you'd have to be there to understand. I guess I'm gonna miss those. Whatever, I don't care.) So, that's what's going on.

I'm also writing a story, it's 8756 words at the moment and rapidly growing. maybe I'll upload it sometime.. or not. Bitches! Destany's the only one that get's to read my shit =D She's just specialer and prettier than all of you. So.. you sir, can suck it. But thanks for reading all this I do appreciate it. You may not be specialer or prettier but you're still my best friend.. even though I have no idea who you are or if anyone really is there... well then.. I'm just.. gonna.. shut up now..

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Everything you say, it's completely rotten. Everything you think, it's completely rotten.

I'm not gonna lie. I've been drinking a lot. I'm not even drunk. My stomach hurts like hell, but I don't feel anything. Not even a buzz. Fuck me! I'm kind of thinking about leaving. My mom's gone again. We were fighting again. Always fighting. What's the point of having a family if all you do is bitch at each other? Who decided it would be a good idea to make kid's stay with their parents until they're 18? Now you just have a bunch of pissed off kids and it's pretty much slavery. I mean, we don't have any real rights, the government just wants us to think we do. We can't do anything because we're under everyone's rules. We're being told what to do by the cops, by our parents, by our schools. I'm sick of it. Why can't everyone just leave me alone? I want to just leave, never come back. I'm thinking about it, honestly. Where would I go? I don't know. Anywhere? It can't get much worse. I don't need anything, just need to get the fuck out. ON another note, Dest should get online because I kind of want to talk to her.


Best movie ever^
Look into it.

Friday, July 15, 2011

Down! Down! Down! To Mephisto's Cafe

Well what is there to say?
I'm considering adding a chat box thing but nobody reads this blog so what's the point?
I don't know if I like it like this or not. If no one reads it then I don't feel insecure about what I post. Although at the same time I feel like it's a waste of time. Whatever. For now, I'll continue writing.


Listen to it^
Streetlight Manifesto - Down, Down, Down to Mephisto's Cafe
My favorite song right now.
Favorite band possibly.
I love them =]

I have a burning desire to post a picture but I don't know what of.
Hmmm.. hang on.




I love this picture. Although it disturbs me because of the guy on the left, It also gives me hope from the guy on the right. I don't understand how people can have such hate for homosexuals.
1. It doesn't affect you so why do you care?
2. It's their choice, their life, not yours.
3. If you really think your 'God' looks down on it, then your so called 'God' will make the choice once they die. But if your God really was against homosexuals, why did he create them? Also you might want to actually read the bible. Leviticus also said no hair cuts upon others. Dumb ass on the left obviously isn't following that one. If you're going to follow one you have to follow them all. Personally I think you shouldn't follow any because it's just a way of justifying your rejection of certain members of society, which is wrong.
4. Life is short. Who are you to make someones life miserable for being who they are? If we were all raised in a society where the majority of people were gay, people would be putting you down for being straight.

Why can't everyone just accept people for who they are? I don't have a problem with someone for their sexual orientation, their race, their ethnicity. Why do people have to judge people for beign different? How about everyone stops being ass holes and everyone learns the word 'acceptance' live by it. Be tolerant of others and don't reject them for who they are.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

And I think to myself.... What a wonderful world.

Joey Ramone - What A Wonderful World

I'm so bored with the U.S.A.

Well, I've found inspiration. Or a path rather. Of what to write. I don't feel like writing what I feel but I'll write random stories, memories, useless rants, and whatever the fuck I feel like writing.



My school ^
Built by the finest hippies available.
Smoking pot while building a school ends up with a bunch of weird shaped buildings all ridiculously far apart.
Despite some of the bitchy teachers, I love it here. I have my friends, my family is no where to be seen, and life is good.

I got my braces off the other day. I now look like this:



















Still scary, just less metal. =]

I don't know what else to write. I had a random story I was gonna write but I can't remember it.
So, for now I have sour patch kids and I'm happy.
Farewell.

Destination Gone Astray

I'm sorry I haven't updated this in a while. I've just lost inspiration for telling others how I feel. Why does it matter? I mean, why does this generation feel the need to upload every thought and every feeling onto the internet? It's pointless. So, I really don't know what to write about. I'm sorry. That's all for now. Maybe I'll write when I find inspiration.

Until then,
Jacob.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

And so we hold each other tightly and we can't wait until tomorrow.

Countless sleepless nights have finally fucked me over. After a while the days start to run togeth.. I spent the entire day thinking today is the 7th when in all actuality today is the 6th. Now you're probably thinking "What's the big deal?" Well, the 7th is 6 months for me and Destany. I was suppose to call her and I called 3 times today and got answering machine every time (Because she is grounded and her mom is only letting her use the phone on our anniversary). Then my mom got home and said tomorrow was Thursday, I suddenly had a moment where I realized my stupidity and I immediately sent Dez a text explaining the situation as summarized as possible. I believe my message read "I spent the entire day thinking today was the 7th -_-"  So, That's the whole story. I'm quite ashamed and I feel rather foolish.

On another note, my mom's boyfriend brought over the PA system for that party (I think I already wrote about that) and it's still here.. I've been singing. I never thought I was good but everyone says I am. Who knows? Maybe I'll sing to Dez if she comes over. Anything could happen =]

Monday, July 4, 2011

There's a heartbreak beat playing all night long

So, I guess I should start by sating Happy Fourth.. I brought my flag out of the closet. My mom doesn't like me to have it out but I think it's beautiful. Just a regular American flag that I tore up with a blade making it all torn up around the edges. Then I took a sharpie and drew a big anarchy sign on it and then I cut myself and dropped blood on it.. just for effect.

Anyway, my mom decided to have a party and well I was okay with the idea because I thought I would know people. Turns out I don't have friends and had no one to invite. I called Dez's mom and invited them and she said they already had plans. She said her sister might be coming over and despite that I'm still hoping with everything I have that they show up.. Every time the doorbell rings I get that feeling in my stomach, that feeling you get when you think something good is about to happen. Then I open the door to find another one of my mom's redneck friends who annoy the hell out of me.

This morning was pleasant.. I woke up to a loud obnoxious voice.. my mom's boyfriend brought over a PA system and set it up like a karaoke machine. -_- He's slept over he the last three nights. They got together 3 nights ago.. I'm about 90% sure he's moving in. This fucking sucks. But I'm not gonna sit here and complain because it's useless. Anyway, now the rednecks my mom hangs out with have been drinking and are singing. They think they're good. They think each other is good. They're not good. I'm still waiting for the doorbell to go off.. I keep looking back to see if anyone is walking by. I know they're not coming.. but does it hurt to hope?

Holiday's suck. All the are is American's finding a reason to get drunk. What does it matter? They do it every night anyway, on Holiday's they just have a reason to behave the way they do every night.

I took a nap under the pool table. Why? Because no one can find me there. That's where I go. The way it's angled if you glance in the room you can't see me. I still usually go in my room to get away from everything but, I don't know, it's too mainstream to hide in your room. Plus everyone could find me there.

Any second now.. the bells gonna ring.. you watch..

I asked my mom if Jerry moves in if I could move in with his roommate where he lives now. It would be amazing. Jon Jon is fucking kick ass.. He would let me do anything I want and we could play guitar whenever the fuck we want because they have big amps there. It would be epic... and Destany lives like 10 minutes away if I walk. Which I wouldn't.. I would take a skateboard. But it'll never happen. They all say Jon Jon is too unstable and my mom says she doesn't trust me to be that close to Destany. I would be so happy there though.

I don't really know what else to write about. I think I'm going to go now and continue waiting for the doorbell that will never ring. Good bye.